Saturday 30 November 2013

Mr. Star Dim Sum Restaurant

星仔茶餐廳

No. 40-3, Lingya 2nd Rd, Lingya Dist
高雄市苓雅區苓雅二路40-3號
(07)338-3466

Monday-Sunday
10:00am-9:00pm

English friendly: no
vegetarian friendly: yes
average cost: 100-200NTD

Despite the name, this is not a dim sum restaurant as I would define it: no carts stacked with baskets of small goodies, no servers heckling you in aggressively accented English, no accidentally ordering more than you can eat (or afford). It is a Hong Kong restaurant, though. In fact it veers dangerously into "themed restaurant" territory (which almost always means horrible food). The second floor is decorated with all sorts of fun vintage Hong Kong paraphernalia; I might even have photographed some of it, if I were THAT kind of food-blogger. I'm not though.


Having been to Hong Kong twice for visa reasons, and once read a Wikipedia article, I know a little something about Hong Kong cuisine. What with the years of British occupation and whatnot, Hong Kong has a history of very INTERESTING east-meets-west fusion dishes. Think tacky American kung-fu movies, but with food. You'll see what I mean in a minute.


On top of not being English friendly, this place is barely Mandarin friendly. Their entire menu is written in Cantonese, so it makes no sense and ordering food becomes a fantastical lottery adventure. Even the Chinglish is different: 三明治 ("sandwich") becomes 三文治, 巧克力 ("chocolate") becomes 朱克力, 吐司 ("toast") becomes 多士, and 泡麵 ("12¢ instant noodles") is disguised as 公仔麵. If only I'd known that before I ordered them...


Luckily the menu has a few pictures, or I would have been completely lost. I saw this guy on there and instantly knew I had to order it...


Aaaaaaaah. The beautiful monstrosity above is French toast stuffed with red bean and drowned in condensed milk. The red bean filling was really well cooked, and the bread was moist but not soggy. It was sweet, real sweet, but not in a sickening way. Absolutely delicious.


My friend ordered a pork and egg 三文治, and it came in a bag. Just what you want to see at a restaurant, like your dinner has been waiting in a refrigerator since morning.


These sort of sandwiches are common "Western" (I laugh but I'm crying inside) breakfast food in Taiwan, and of course the French toast above would also be nice in the morning. Yet oddly enough, this restaurant only opens for lunch and dinner. An interesting business decision on their part!


The opposite side of their impenetrable menu has a wide selection of interesting and/or horrifying drinks. And so we embarked on another drink adventure!


On the left is my friend's "somethingsomethingsomething fresh milk"; on the right, my "salty lemon seven." The mysterious "fresh milk" drink certainly looked like fresh milk, but it tasted mostly like 7-UP with a subtle undertone of whole cream.


It TURNS OUT that the "seven" in my drink stands for 七喜, which is Mandarin too: Mandarin for "also 7-UP." The "salty lemon" refers to that slice of extremely salty cured lime, assumedly an authentic Hong Kong food(?) item.

WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY.

That's all I have to say.


Like I said, the menu mislead me into ordering this bowl of glammed-up instant ramen. It was topped with cheese, which was fun; the quintessential example of peculiar decisions made in Hong Kong kitchens. Unfortunately the cheese was pretty skimpy (that up there is mostly egg), though the soup was good.


But when I was finished with the soup it was still just a bowl of instant noodles... This shit would never fly in AMERICA, dammit. People here seem to think that instant noodles are just another type of noodle, as worthy of respect as udon or pasta. Well, I respectfully disagree!


And here we have dessert! This is 甜不甩. What does that even mean. Well I guess it means 湯圓, or "soup balls", topped with peanuts. Soup balls are like mochi, but different from mochi because they have to be steeped in soup, but really pretty much exactly like mochi. Maybe less sweet. I thought this dessert would be super sugary, but it was sort of... not. I think they skimped on the syrup at the bottom of the dish. Still, it was good. As I always say, one can never go wrong with crushed peanuts!

On taste alone I would probably give this restaurant a 3/5, but I had a really fun time puzzling over the menu, then puzzling over what they delivered to our table. It was a nice break from the ordinary! So if you're in the mood for an adventure, I recommend you pay Mr. Star a visit.

OVERALL RATING: 4/5

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